Zack Snyder’s Justice League. Zack Snyder. 2021. ⚃

Yes! It’s 4:3. Nice.

This reminds me of something… Yes!

The harshest criticism of Zack Snyder ever.

That looks so real!

Are these 3D models Snyder had left over from 300?

Is that supposed to be Darkseid? It’s not a very good rendering…

I’m kinda enjoying this movie, though. I like slow, and I like stupid nonsense, and this is slow, stupid nonsense.

If you’re looking for a ponderous, pompous movie that doesn’t make much sense, you’ve come to the right place. Why not lean into that shit: Do colour correction so excessive there’s not more than a colour and a half per scene? Have all scenes happen in a very energy-conscious world where a laboratory only has a single 40W light in one corner? Have everybody stand around spouting portentous shit at each other?

Why not!

Hey! Somebody wrote that this scene was creepy. But Snyder plays Song to the Siren, and it’s a totally touching scene.

It’s sports time!

OK, bored now.

What… is that flap there? Is a loin cloth really necessary?

Is that even possible!?

I thought the first two hours were fine, but once it got to the Superman bit, the movie has totally stalled. It’s been an hour of… er… “character development”… and that’s just boring.

But now it looks like it’s gonna start moving again?

Yes!

That was a really entertaining action scene. Probably the best super-hero movie action scene ever.

Dance, Girl, Dance. Dorothy Arzner. 1940. ⚃

This is pretty amusing…

Hula!

This special effect doesn’t seem… er… thought through.

I didn’t recognise Lucille Ball!

Lucille doing burlesque.

Look, see?

I’m enjoying this movie, but it’s not quite gelling for me. The pacing just seems off. If it’d been a bit more zippy, we’d be in screwball territory, but instead it’s a drama with some funny scenes here and there.

I like the sets — very stylish.

Nightbreed. Clive Barker. 1990. ⚂

David Cronenberg! I didn’t know that he was in this…

But… perhaps I haven’t seen this before? I thought I had seen all horror movies from this era, but I must have missed this one for some reason or other.

It’s scary!

OK, I’m gonna go ahead and guess that the creepy psychologist is the serial killer, and not the hunky lead.

Oh! I read the comics adaptation of this less than a year ago? Oops. And that was probably why I got this blu ray in the first place.

OK, then I’m not so clever after all for guessing who the killer is. Darn!

This is the worst music ever. Did Barker write it himself?

Perhaps? Perhaps not?

That’s certainly a facial design.

The performances are almost fascinatingly bad. I don’t just mean this guy, whose previous credits are (on Hellraiser and Hallraiser II):

and

but even the professionals — I mean, I’ve never seen Cronenberg this… well, awkward.

So I guess it’s Barker’s fault.

Such shoulder.

So is this all a metaphor for finding a gay bar? Clive!

Is that the guy from Hill Street Blues?

Yes!

I thought his name was Sicking or something, but that’s somebody else.

Right, this was a troubled shoot:

Barker previewed the first cut of Nightbreed with a temporary soundtrack that did not go well, as people were confused by the characters’ motives. He made some changes and the second test screening was much more successful. However, the ending with Decker’s death was not well received and Barker changed it.

It had a pretty high budget (at the time) of $11M, but only made $16M at the box office, so… it didn’t exactly bomb, but didn’t make back the money.

What does this even mean:

He was given a budget of $11 million, which was a considerable increase from the $2 million he had to work with on Hellraiser. His goal was to make the Star Wars of horror films.

Barker had signed a contract for a followup movie, but that never happened, naturally.

The performances are so hokey!

Is this Princess Leia?

Who’s that then? Is that Cronenberg? Weird.