Uhm… uhm… why do I have this bluray again? Hm…

Oh… I think… I bought it because I was watching the commentaries on a horror movie, and the special effects guy said that this was the best? Something like that?

Buying this based on that sounds like something I’d do.

But I don’t know anything about this. And the first couple minutes look awfully cheesy.

That’s not an extensive movie directing career… but he’s done a tons of TV shows. Including two Twin Peaks s2 episodes. And just…

… an endless number of TV things.

Bit I guess it’s not CSI: Fumblebum, so it’s a bit more high class.

As I guess you can tell by my imdb-ing so much while watching this: I’m really, really bored by this. I give it ten more minutes, and then I’m ditching it.

…:

This movie explores the depths of human emotions. It incorporates dramatic struggles ranging from a family being ripped apart because of a divorce (all too common in this work-a-day society), and a complex friendship being stretched to the limit because of the legendary California Videogame Championship.

So this is a movie beloved by assholes?

OK, five more minutes and I’m ditching this. Unless something interesting happens.

Well, OK, there’s a plot forming…

OK, I’m ditching this at 28 minutes.

It’s not … The Worst Movie Ever or anything, but I have zero interest in watching this.

The Wizard. Todd Holland. 1989. ☐

BY EMACS! THIS IS THAT MOVIE!

OK, rewind: When I watched Playtime the other year, my mind was going “Tati… Tati… I’m sure I remember a Frenchey comedy director from my childhood…” And the thing was, I just remembered one single scene: People, holding parasols and stuff, running down into the underground (on steps) and then coming back up again somewhere else, unrealistically fast.

I tried googling for that, but I came up with nothing.

Whodathunk.

BUT THIS IS IT!!!! This is the scene I remember from when I was like… ten? I remember watching it on TV with my family? I remember laughing until I almost died? But I also remember it being in colour? So obviously my memories are suspect, but…

I’m so excited now!

OK, unpause the movie.

I didn’t type anything while watching this, because I was too busy laughing. I’ve LOL-ed out loud more over the past 90 minutes than in the preceding three months.

That was just… the funniest thing ever. I guess you could say that the humour is on a Buster Keaton/Mister Bean *shiver* tip, but it’s not maudlin like Keaton and it’s not embarrassing (or unpleasant) like Atkinson usually is. It’s super duper silly… but there’s also all these details: There’s so much subtext to these scenes. For instance, I love how that British woman takes to Hubert, but he’s oblivious… and that it doesn’t end the way you’d guess at all. Tati doesn’t succumb to the obvious impulse of making his Hulot the hero here, but letting him remain… unresolved.

This is simply a wonderful movie. It’s so meticulous. And gorgeously shot. I’m not surprised that I remember this as a major event from when I was like ten.

Monsieur Hulot’s Holiday. Jacques Tati. 1953. ⚅

How odd — it looks like this has been dubbed into German? There’s no English soundtrack in this .mkv, but the lips definitely don’t match up to what they’re saying…

Oh!

There are two different versions of the film, one in which the actors speak English, and one in which they speak German.

Hm… Oh! There’s another file here — where they speak English, but otherwise identical? The lips match up a lot better here.

It still seems like it was filmed without audio and the voices were looped in, but it’s less strange in the English version.

Yeah, that’s a Herzog shot.

Anyway, this is the most “traditional” Herzog movie I can remember watching? That is, this could have been basically any Italian/German/Soviet copro-duction from around this time?

But I mean, only good.

Klaus! Finally!

It’s so cosy.

Oh, wow, now it’s not a run-of-the-mill movie any more.

Once Klaus is here, it’s all suddenly fascinating. I love how he plays Dracula as both terrifying and pathetic at the same time.

I love this! I haven’t seen the Murnau since like the 90s, so I don’t remember it in detail. But is this a scene-by-scene remake or something? So many of the shots look familiar, but I haven’t seen this movie before.

Wikipedia says I’m not insane:

Several shots in the movie are faithful recreations of iconic images from Murnau’s original film, some almost perfectly identical to their counterparts, intended as homages to Murnau.[

Man, that’s a lot of rats. If there’s “No Rats Were Hurt During The Making Of This Movie”, I don’t believe it.

Nosferatu. Werner Herzog. 1979. ⚄