I’ve heard so many bad things about this movie that I assumed that it had to be awesome, but… that opening sequence? It was kinda boring? None of the action scenes quite … fit, and the talky-talky parts were zzz.

Keanu!

Nice office!

So meta!

Are those blue glasses a subtle hint?!!?

IT COULD BE

This is getting funnier by the scene.

Wachowski really likes this framing — blurry at one end of the frame and then a person talking almost at the camera at the other end of the frame.

Anyway, I’m really enjoying this. It’s a fun movie. Then again, I can see how people that had a religious relationship with the first Matrix movie would dislike this. And… there’s so many meta bits, and people hate meta.

But… the action scenes are as striking as in the Wachowski’s earlier movies? Did Lana’s sister do the action scenes before?

Heh heh

OK, the movie’s kinda slow now… I’m not sure all the soul searching here is really necessary.

In some ways, it feels like I’m still waiting for the movie to begin, two hours in.

This bit… where the movie turns into a fast zombie movie? Not that entertaining.

eh

Anyway, I really liked… bits of this movie? But there were bits that kinda dragged. And it’s disappointing that the action scenes were more like “whoo?” than “whoa!”

The Matrix Ressurrections. Lana Wachowski. 2021. ⚃

I wouldn’t normally watch a movie like this — it sounds super dreary. I’m guessing this is going to be all “people are so stupid!” with TV aesthetics, and…

My god, this is tedious. It’s like watching an ever-so-slightly stupider version of real life in 2020. And things don’t get stupider than real life in 2020.

Oh, Meryl Streep is playing Trump? Well, OK, but it’s still not actually funny — it’s just annoying.

Oh, fuck! This goes on for two and a half hours!?

Fuck this. It’s too boring.

Don’t Look Up. Adam McKay. 2021. ⚁

[Edit:

The only reason I tried watching this is because it’s a movie people write a lot about, and:

You know: it’s a Netflix programmer– those are always like 20-30% “Here’s the stuff” and 70% badly-edited scenes shot in a non-descript Holiday Inn(?).

I agree with everything he’s writing there, but the first 30 minutes were brutally boring. As with (almost) any Netflix movie. I shouldn’t have let myself get sucked into watching an awful Netflix movie, just because a bunch of assholes are upset about it existing. I love that those assholes are upset. But I’m watching Lubitsch now instead.]

That’s no enough plants!

Noooo! Not the cute dog!

So I guess this script has been generated from Netflix user polls? “Do you like: 1) Dogs”

Right.

The aesthetics of this is just offensive. It’s “Netflix gave us almost no money but we have to shoot this thing anyway” aesthetics.

It’s so weird how all the actors here remind me of… somebody more famous. So this isn’t Stellan.

And this isn’t that guy from those shows.

(I could be more erudite, but I’m so drnk.)

Or is it that guy?!?!

No

I can’t be?!

But that’s her!! Isn’t it? Yes it is! Veronica’s Closet!

And that guy is the guy! From… Ugly Betty? IMDB agrees with me.

Perhaps all of them are what they seem.

And they’re all from sitcoms from 20 years ago!

This is quite amusing.

What! It’s her! Isn’t it?

From 2 Broke Girls!

Yes!

This movie has all of the sitcom actors!

But this is fun. It’s got serious pacing issues, though.

This is so cute.

It’s very modern. The precariat and all.

This is really cute. And I love all the actors. And it’s really cute. Did I mention that it’s really cute?

But it’s got bits that just aren’t that exciting? I feel terrible writing this, because I love every individual scene. I’m just not loving the aggregate.

Single All The Way. Michael Mayer. 2021. ⚃