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Hard Candy

Wow, this is creepy!

I hope there’s a twist soon. Is Page gonna kill the perv soon or what?

Perhaps Page is a vampire!? That’d be a good twist.

Oh!

It’d make sense, even!

Yup. Vampire. But one of those vampires that can be out when it’s day?

This is getting kinda tedious… when’s the vampire stuff starting!!!

OK, so she’s not a vampire, but she’s definitely torturing the perv.

I’m so shocked at the twist!

(It’s basically Buffy, but a decade later.)

What!? She hates Goldfrapp? That’s a twist!

It’s just… kinda boring? I mean, nobody watching this could possibly care whether this guy dies (or whatever), so is the tension supposed to be whether he escapes and kills Page or something? But… it’s a bit hard to care about that, either?

His fake stories are so boring!!! This is just badly written.

Yeah, right.

All the twists are just so… obvious. And it never ends!

Oh! A different person!

Hard Candy. David Slade. 2005.

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