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Supergirl

Wow! This is camper than a troupe of Eagle Scouts!

And such effects! I love it!

The soundtrack has somebody going *ssswuuuush*! I mean, for real! Somebody is saying *ssswuuuush* while Supergirl is flying!

I love it!

Stop scaring the horses!

It’s that guy! Max Headroom! Isn’t it?

There’s so many familiar faces here…

So many faces.

Why is she calling herself Linda Lee? I thought it was Linda Danvers?

Oh never mind:

She is not to be confused with Linda Lee Danvers, the secret identity used by the Kara Zor-El incarnation of Supergirl prior to the events of 1985’s Crisis on Infinite Earths.

It’s some kind of geek thing.

This movie has 4.4 on imdb, but I think Those People are totally misreading this. It’s just a bunch of silly silliness, and they’re talking about it as if it isn’t on purpose?

Howard Jones on the soundtrack again!? I mean, it was a big hit, but the same hit twice in the same movie?

I love it!

I love how low stakes this is. The plot is that … they’re arguing over who’s getting the hot gardener!?

Romance-o-vision!

I wonder how they got this made. Surely the studio would have wanted a serious movie? Like Superman? And instead they made this very tongue in cheek comedy thing?

That never works. I mean, commercially. It annoys the nerds and normal people don’t care.

This is a very cogent review:

Unless you really like the superman movies, or are under the age of six, the movie would probably be utterly boring. The only good thing that I can say about the movie is that I like it, but I don’t know why.

Magnificent.

Just when you thought that Faye Dunaway had chewed up all the scenery, Peter O’Toole shows up again. It turns out that there was some more scenery left after all.

I love how they manage to always have the lights on Dunaway’s eyes.

This is a pretty expensive movie, right? $35M in 1984 dollars — that’s a lot. And the movie mostly looks really good. But whenever they cut over to a greenscreen scene, it’s the quality of… what somebody could do with home VCR equipment at the time. It’s so weird. Did they run out of money? Or did the VFX company just a bunch of geeks that hated the movie so much that they wanted it to fail?

It’s the worst compositing ever done, I think.

Let me google:

Dunaway and O’Toole earned Golden Raspberry Award nominations for Worst Actress and Worst Actor, respectively. However, Slater was nominated for a Saturn Award for Best Actress. The film’s failure ultimately led producers Alexander and Ilya Salkind to sell the Superman film rights to The Cannon Group, Inc. in 1986.

I want to give the movie a , because it’s so bonkers. But at the end of the day, it’s a competition I mean, the last third drags. So:

Supergirl. Jeannot Szwarc. 1984.

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