Godzilla. Roland Emmerich. 1998.

Oops. I thought this was a new Godzilla movie, but instead it’s a 4K version of the Emmerich extravaganza from 1998.

Well let’s see.

Emmerich made this on the heels of the mega-super-duper-success Independence Day, and… it’s another catastrophe movie where New York gets flattened. It’s weird how Emmerich has removed all the Japanese bits from the Godzilla phenomenon. I mean, that’s what people liked about the thing, but here it’s all Matthew Broderick and Hank Azaria and er it doesn’t really work.

But I guess Broderick is a pretty good choice if you want to substitute one American actor for a gaggle of Japanese children.

And instead of Godjira being a warning to us, it’s an invasion (laying 200 eggs) that’s going to take over the world. It’s more like a Jurassic Park On Broadway than a Godzilla movie.

It’s very 90s. I mean, teens.

There’s so many scenes of guys in small rooms talking while looking at screens. I mean, the CGI is good. For its time, it’s excellent; I’m almost starting to wondering whether they’ve redone bits for this 4K version, but probably not. They’ve wisely rendered everything at night or under water, so you can’t see what it looks like, rally.

It’s just hard to care what happens here. I mean, we’re all rooting for Godjira, right?

It ends with a THERE”S DOING TO BE A SEQUEL ending, but there wasn’t. Because this is a pretty joyless version of the Godzilla concept.

Sånger från andra våningen. Roy Andersson. 2000.

Andersson is so brilliant at presenting these ugly/beautiful tableaux that it doesn’t really matter what else is going on.

The performers are so wonderful. They embody whatever is going on, and do their bits perfectly. It’s not naturalistic acting, but in the context they’re in, they’re prefect. This sort of thing could have gone into schtick so fast if the performances hadn’t been this great.

It’s funny, it’s heartbreaking, it’s riveting.

But some of the bits in the second half don’t quite resolve, which is disappointing after a solid first half. Some of the later scenes seem like random ideas instead of being vital. Is starts feeling more like a short film compilation than a movie.

Pathology. Marc Schölermann. 2008.

I have absolutely no idea why I have this movie.

It’s got Q in it, but… is that a good thing?

It’s about a pathologist who gets involved with you know stuff, and complications ensue. But the main point of this movie is about getting to do grisly special effects. So much corpse.

I guess it’s a competent enough thriller… It’s got all the normal plot elements. The cinematography isn’t much beyond a TV series, except for how they’ve colour-graded it: Everything is in a grey blue tone, making everybody look corpse-like.

I just checked how far I’ve gotten in this movie. I thought “I must be at 1:30h at least” and I’m forty minutes in.

This shit is beyond tedious and I’m bailing now.