Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers

Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers. Peter Jackson. 2002. ⚃

Oops. 2002 called and wants their CGI back. I guess it’s more disturbing in a movie like this where there are so mane gorgeous actual shots of things, and then there’s… this…

Anyway! I’m excited to start on the next Lord of the Rings movie. I don’t really remember what this one is all about… I did remember much of the first movie, and I remember the ending of the last movie, but I have no idea what’s happening in this one.

I think Toklien was kinda against the industrial revolution?

Eeeeevil!!!

Oh yeah! This is the movie with the ents! So it’s the big fight against Saruman!

It’s all side quests this movie, I think.

Nice forest.

Jackson is upping the comedy routines in this movie, because there’s… really not much happening.

I mean, there’s a lot of stuff happening, but it doesn’t really seem to be … pertinent?

It’s a good strategy, because this is very entertaining. As a movie, it makes no sense, but it’s fun to watch.

Ouch. That CGI.

There really isn’t much going on in this movie. I admire Jackson for committing fully to filming four hours of filler scenes (I’m guessing) in a quite stylish way, but I’m kinda bored now, and I wasn’t bored at all during the first movie.

I hope something of significance is gonna happen sometime soon.

An, no, nothing of significance happens.

I had a peek at imdb. The first movie has an 8.8 rating (fair), and this one has an … 8.7 rating. People are insane!

I mean, it’s just… who cares about these horsey people? For hours and hours?

Such blue.

I feel that we’re not really getting much from the orc side of things. What’s the orc motivation for going to war? Do they want more meat in their diet? Is there an ocrmaiden at home they’re fighting for? What are their opinions on Emacs key bindings?

Well, that was disappointing. The first movie was fabulous, but this… wasn’t.